Work Peoples Reactions:Feels Like Twighlight Zone Sometimes

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Work Peoples Reactions:Feels Like Twighlight Zone Sometimes

Postby liquidstayce » Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:33 pm

I'm down 65 lbs now. My quality of life is just so much better already. I love getting up every morning and going to work because that means I get to pick out my latest cute outfit out of my closet. Both mentally and physically I feel really good. Now I realize I do not have control on how people react around me but things are starting to get weird at work. It is like being in the twighlight zone sometimes. People react to the changes in so many different ways. Sometimes it is really cool but others is just down right weird and in some cases not cool at all.

Some people who see me say nothing which is just fine. Others that run into me tell me how wonderful I look and I get lots of compliments on how I dress now. It's nice. I enjoy it. Still others say to me things like .." What up skinny or How is it going slim?" Which of course makes me just cringe because being skinny is the last thing I want to be in this world. I know it is just a figure of speech or term of endearment so no biggie. It still odd because before of course they would never dare say "What up fatty?" Why do they think "What up Skinny" is an OK thing? Society really is so twisted. Ok.. whatever. I'm over it. That will never change.

So those are not that big of a deal but I have had some more drastic reactions this week. One guy who is kind of weird and creepy anyway was standing with me while we were waiting to get into the conference room for a meeting. Granted he says weird stuff all the time and looks like a child molester so this shouldn't suprise me. Ok.. back to the story - So several of my other co-workers were around including some of the Sr VP's and executive staff. We are all chatting away about the latest success of the software install that was just done for our Radiology department. Out of the blue Mr. Creepy guy starts in on me. He prefaces his comment with "Please don't take this the wrong way..." So of course he now has my attention and has also gained the attention of everyone else around us. They all turn there heads towards him and everyone stops talking. He then says, "You look absolutely stunning these days. Absolutely amazing. (He raises his voice even higher) How much weight have you lost?" He keeps going on and on and on. You know privately if he said that to me it wouldn't be a huge deal but in this situation it was so inappropriate. I politely said thank you and left it at that. He continued to go on and on and I became really uncomfortable as did the people around us. My friend John just stands there shaking his head and laughing under his breath because this guy is just a nut case all the time.

So next situation. I'm walking down the hall and another co-worker says hi to me. She doesn't just look me in the eye and say hi. She looks me up and down from head to toe. Not just once but several times. I'm wondering if maybe I am just imaging this. Am I being really self-consious now or something? Maybe I am the one that is paranoid.
(start playing twighlight music theme here)

The final situation is a girl at work who I really bonded with prior to losing weight now no longer seems comfortable around me at all. I suspect it is because she is having a hard time dealing with her own obesity issues. We use to talk all of the time and had a lot of heart to hearts about it. Talked about our struggles with diets, working out, etc. Now she just seems really short with me the last few weeks. All her communications is via email when before she always picked up the phone. I had a meeting with her yesterday and she hardly could make eye contact when we were sitting directly across from one another for an hour. :dunno: Again, maybe I am the one that is paranoid and its all in my head. Anyone else ever go through anything like this?
~stacy
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Postby Gidan » Thu Oct 06, 2005 9:15 pm

You will get different reactions form peopel based on the type of people they are. Some will not care, some will be proud of yoru accomplishment and other will be pissed because you were able to do what they could not. The final woman may look at you know and see herself as a failure, every time she need to see or speak with you it remindes her of how you have succedded where she could not.

When you really get down to it though, the only person who really matters is you. What they think really isn't important. If somone is pissed at you because you were able to do what they could not, then they need to deal with their own issues. Dont let the reactions of others get you down. Be proud of your own acomplishments.
For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.
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Postby leah » Thu Oct 06, 2005 11:21 pm

i know what you're going through

i think my weight loss cost me one of my best friends... i went down about 95 lbs since i hit college, she however went up almost as much... and now she pretty much won't hang out with me and every time i DO see her it's "hey anorexic!" or "are you even eating?"

the best reaction i've gotten, ever, was the other night when i ran into a friend at a bar that i haven't seen in about a year... he gave me a big bear hug, stepped back and looked at me, and said "you look amazing--i'm so happy for you. you finally made it." and left it at that. i nearly cried. ^_^

most "compliments" that end up feeling more like veiled insults are jealousy-based... but don't focus on them; focus on the ones that are genuine and hold those in your mind in the midst of the people who would try to bring you down.

and hey, 65 lbs! great job, chica... i wanna see some pix! i bet it feels great.
lolz
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 5:18 am

Thanks guys. I like what you said Gidan. All that really matters is me and what I think. Well.. I place a very high value on what my husband thinks as well but he is extremely encouraging and supportive so that makes it easy. A lot of people I talk to who have lost a drastic amt of weight along with health pros that are taking care of me all say that if you had a good relationship with your spouse before that just gets stronger and the bad relationships just get worse. A lot of the people on the obesityhelp.com boards actually talk about marriages ending that did get worse. I guess I didn't think about that ever applying to ordinary work friendships.
Sounds like you completely understand Leah. Just wish the last person would come around. I'm still kind of hoping after some time she will just get use to me for me again and look past what is on the outside.

Around the 1st week in December I will probably be close to 100lbs down. By year out in April I should hit my goal range and be about 130-140 down. I'll post some before and after pictures at that time.
~stacy
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Postby Trielelvan » Fri Oct 07, 2005 5:32 am

liquidstayce wrote:Around the 1st week in December I will probably be close to 100lbs down. By year out in April I should hit my goal range and be about 130-140 down. I'll post some before and after pictures at that time.


How is it possibly possible you are able to lose 130-140 lbs and not be a stick thin rail????? If I recall, you were not aiming to be around 100lbs. Sorry, just reading that number made my eyes bug out of my head. All your pictures from your wedding and the others you have up that are recent... I'd place you at maaaaaybe 200 lbs tops. I mean I know some people carry and hold weight well. but damn woman!

Anyway, 65lbs gone = uber grats to you :) That's awesome!
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Postby Darcler » Fri Oct 07, 2005 6:37 am

I know, that was my reaction also. So I went back to her countdown thread and Mop said she topped out at 280 (sorry if I am guessing higher) So 140 lost would put her right around "normal".
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 6:57 am

Funny you said that. My friend John at work said he guessed me to be around 180ish and never had a clue I was about 100lbs more then that.

I started out at 281. Today I am 216 and about 36% bodyfat.
281 - 140/130lbs = 141/131 for goal weight seems very reasonable and I'd like to be 16 - 20% BF.. body compisition is much more important to me. So if I am 150 and have that percentage that is great too. That would be some amazing muscle. Keep in mind my Height is 5'4 so in other words I am short too. When I buy suits these days I am wearing a size 14-16 petite. Closer to 14 these last few weeks. I'm down from a size 22-24.

Yes, I hide my weight rather well. The wedding picture you saw of me I weighed 260 on that day and the wedding dress is a size 20 from Davids Bridal. After our wedding I packed on another 21 lbs. Prior to our wedding this time last year I was working out like a maniac too. When I am lifting that gives me some more curves. The fat mostly sits in the middle, ass, thighs. Wedding dress covered those areas well. It's magic!!!!!!!!

End Goal: I WANT TO LOOK GOOD NAKED! Doesn't everybody?

I have some better fat pics on my profile here if you dare want to go look. Warning you in advance. Scroll to middle part of page
http://www.obesityhelp.com?m=713580
The worst one of me sitting down is the same day of my wedding. Check out the double chin in the picture with Dana too after that. All the pics posted on that page are all befores. Some just are better angles then others.
~stacy
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Postby Tacks » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:15 am

I just wanted to add that the prettiest thing about Stayce is her attitude (although I think she is a hottie at any weight). She's by far one of the most positive upbeat people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. Your weight was never an "issue" for me because you were such a wonderful person to begin with. Fuck the haters. I just want for you to be as happy as you can be and if that means losing all that weight then so be it, I'm proud of you! You deserve to feel good about yourself because you are a good person. Keep up the hard work Stayce.

PS: Mop you rock for being so supportive, love you both!
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:16 am

ohh and another bonus result.. prior to weight loss my blood pressure was topping out at 150/110. I was borderline ready to start BP meds. At my OB/GYN this past week my BP was 116/65


Medical guidelines state that a normal blood pressure for most adults is less than 120/80. Drug treatment is recommended if your blood pressure is at or above 140/90. For individuals aged 40 to 70 years, each 20/10 mm Hg increase in blood pressure doubles the risk of cardiovascular disease, including heart attack and stroke, beginning at a blood pressure of 115/75 mm Hg. No doubt in my mind I was headed in that direction a few years down the line if I didn't change.

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Last edited by liquidstayce on Fri Oct 07, 2005 2:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
~stacy
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:19 am

thanks T... Looking good naked and improved self esteem is a bonus - It's about being healthy for me. About lowering BP, about no more joint pain, no more awful injuries. Yes.. all that does make me much happier. Living a long life with Dana - that is the prize!
~stacy
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Postby Tacks » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:21 am

Don't forget the kids! =P
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:22 am

lol.. speaking of kids.. like my new avatar =)
~stacy
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Postby Tacks » Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:30 am

Haha I saw that, funny.
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Postby Trielelvan » Fri Oct 07, 2005 11:04 am

All I have to say is - wow. No, you didn't look 260 then at all. You carry your weight very proportionately - like amazingly so (and yeah, you are a hottie anyway indeed lol you are beautiful :)).

liquidstayce wrote:End Goal: I WANT TO LOOK GOOD NAKED! Doesn't everybody?

Amen sister.
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Postby Darcler » Fri Oct 07, 2005 11:15 am

True.
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Postby DangerPaul » Fri Oct 07, 2005 11:30 am

Tacks wrote:I just wanted to add that the prettiest thing about Stayce is her attitude (although I think she is a hottie at any weight). She's by far one of the most positive upbeat people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. Your weight was never an "issue" for me because you were such a wonderful person to begin with. Fuck the haters. I just want for you to be as happy as you can be and if that means losing all that weight then so be it, I'm proud of you! You deserve to feel good about yourself because you are a good person. Keep up the hard work Stayce.

PS: Mop you rock for being so supportive, love you both!


wtf? Who stole Taxx's login info?

ps
On a side note, cong Stayce, you have gotten shit from me for some time, glad to see it's all finally paying off for you. People will always make stupid comments if they do not know how to properly approach people. I had a friend lose almost 300lbs and I didn't know how to handle it when I saw her after the weight was lost, I just told her it was nice to be able to touch hands when I hugged her and left it at that.
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Postby Darcler » Fri Oct 07, 2005 2:25 pm

lol so smooth <3
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Postby liquidstayce » Fri Oct 07, 2005 2:31 pm

Tx Trielelvan.

Ha.. Taxx is a pussy cat at heart. The NT persona is a cover. He has said that plenty of times. I think it also helps that he and Kiz met us in person too not to long ago.

Thanks DP. Actually, I really can't remember you giving me shit. That is really cool about your friend dropping 300lbs.
~stacy
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Postby DangerPaul » Fri Oct 07, 2005 4:29 pm

I am amazed you do not remember it. It started when I said in a thread all fat people need to die and you sent me a PM and we discussed my mother and so on and so forth. It was not directed directly at you, but I have said many a malicious thing about heavy women on NT.

But I should clarify, since I had a reconing a long time ago and never posted my thoughts on it. I do not dispise overweight people. I dispise the overweight people who
A: ) dress like they are a thin super-model type
B: ) overweight people who blame everything in the world for their weight, other than themselves
C: ) people who are morbidly obese who make the stupid "fat is beautiful" "big beautiful person" and nonsense like that.

Fat is not an atractive look for anyone, male or woman and those who glorify the fact they can eat the average person's weight in Cheetos need to stfu about it and visit Jenny Craig. I can talk, I was always athletic/thin, I got lazy and gained almost 80lbs sitting on my ass playing EQ. I didn't dress in skin tight clothes, I didn't blame anyone for it and I sure as fuck didn't glorify I had gotten so big. Wow, this sounds like a flame, it's not. Anyways, I got off my ass, lost 50ish pounds or better, gained back some muscle mass and couldn't be happier with myself currently, so I am proud of you for going through with all of this (this is too all the people who made a weight loss effort, not just Stayce), versus sitting there telling everyone it's not your fault while you chomped down your 32nd Hoho for the day.
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Postby Trielelvan » Fri Oct 07, 2005 4:32 pm

DangerPaul wrote:I dispise the overweight people who
A: ) dress like they are a thin super-model type


Spandex is a fucking priviledge - not a right. :rofl:
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Postby DangerPaul » Fri Oct 07, 2005 4:34 pm

Trielelvan wrote:
DangerPaul wrote:I dispise the overweight people who
A: ) dress like they are a thin super-model type


Spandex is a fucking priviledge - not a right. :rofl:


AfuckingMEN :angel:
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Postby leah » Fri Oct 07, 2005 4:43 pm

thx paul~
lolz
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Postby Adivina » Sat Oct 08, 2005 8:20 am

I agree with Taxx 100% and I've told you this before. I have always found you to be absolutely stunning, you have a wonderful personality :)
Donnel wrote:
Erodalak wrote:Who needs an education when you are hawt like advina

fixt :P
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Postby DangerPaul » Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:43 am

leah wrote:thx paul~


<3
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