A whole new meaning to shit-eating grin....

[Martrae]

Accused goes to extremes

TORONTO -- An accused drunk driver tried but failed to foil a police breathalyser after stuffing his mouth full of feces. "I don't think alcohol alone would make you do something as disgusting as that," Insp. Tom McDonald said.

Arrested Sunday after his pickup was pulled over on a highway just outside Barrie, Ont., the 59-year-old driver was put in a cruiser and taken to a police station for testing.

Sgt. James Buchanan said the prisoner vomited, urinated and defecated in the rear of the squad car.

After arriving at the station, he said the man grabbed a handful of his own waste "and placed it in his mouth, attempting to trick the breathalyser machine."

It didn't work, Buchanan said.

Breathalyser tests registered twice the legal limit of alcohol in the man, he said. The man was charged with impaired driving.

[Tuggan]

wonder what the legal drinking limit in canada is, cause that motherfucker had to be totally wasted.

[Aryylas]

Funny stuff.

[Shannan]

/gag

[Harrison]

He wouldn't have tried that if he knew how a breathalyzer works.

The part where it said double the legal limit of alcohol isn't true. A breathalyzer doesn't measure alcohol on breath like people think.

[Adivina]

[xaoshaen]

He wouldn't have tried that if he knew how a breathalyzer works.

The part where it said double the legal limit of alcohol isn't true. A breathalyzer doesn't measure alcohol on breath like people think.

Actually, the amount of alcohol on your breath is exactly what a breathalyzer measures. The machine essentially measures the the amount of alcohol being released during alveolar exchange, which is directly related to BAC.

[Adivina]

I think he meant like smell wise... I dunno

[Diekan]

Fucking Canadians.

[Darcler]

He was drunk enough to eat shit. Even if he knew how it worked, Im sure he didnt remember by that point.

[fefn]

Pretty sure the legal limit in Ontario is 0.08ml

[fefn]

Fucking Canadians.

eet fuk

[Diekan]

Pretty sure the legal limit in Ontario is 0.08ml

Are you talking about their daily fecal intake, or their blood acohol limit?

[Langston]

Pretty sure the legal limit in Ontario is 0.08ml

Are you talking about their daily fecal intake, or their blood acohol limit?

Oh, Canadians are REQUIRED to be much more full of shit than just .08

[Harrison]

He wouldn't have tried that if he knew how a breathalyzer works.

The part where it said double the legal limit of alcohol isn't true. A breathalyzer doesn't measure alcohol on breath like people think.

Actually, the amount of alcohol on your breath is exactly what a breathalyzer measures. The machine essentially measures the the amount of alcohol being released during alveolar exchange, which is directly related to BAC.

My point is breathalyzers are so innacurate it is stupid.

It doesn't narrow down the variables at all. Any number of chemicals can change the color in a chemical reaction needed to show up on the spectothingamajig.

[xaoshaen]

My point is breathalyzers are so innacurate it is stupid.

I'm not sure how posting random, untrue statements about breathalyzers is supposed to demonstrate their innaccuracy as opposed to your own, but whatever. They're certaintly not the most accurate tool, which is why they're generally used as a field indicator. They do provide a useful indication that the person who tested positive needs either medical or judicial attention, particularly when the subject rates significantly above the legal limit (i.e. a .12 in a .08 area).

It doesn't narrow down the variables at all.

Of course they do. They can be wrong for a variety of reasons, but you know that something triggered the relevant chemical reaction. This is where field sobriety tests, gas mass spectrometers, etc come in to play.

Any number of chemicals can change the color in a chemical reaction needed to show up on the spectothingamajig.

There are several types of breathalyzer, not all of which rely on potassium dichromat changing color to indicate an excessive BAC. Most of the false positives are due to non-ethanol compounds containing a methyl group... hardly "any number of chemicals".

[brinstar]

He wouldn't have tried that if he knew how a breathalyzer works.

The part where it said double the legal limit of alcohol isn't true. A breathalyzer doesn't measure alcohol on breath like people think.

Actually, the amount of alcohol on your breath is exactly what a breathalyzer measures. The machine essentially measures the the amount of alcohol being released during alveolar exchange, which is directly related to BAC.

My point is breathalyzers are so innacurate it is stupid.

It doesn't narrow down the variables at all. Any number of chemicals can change the color in a chemical reaction needed to show up on the spectothingamajig.

sorry, you're completely wrong.

[Martrae]

Drawing from my 20+ years in law enforcement I can tell you that there
are a number of things can that cause a breathalyzer to show an
inaccurate reading, depending on what type of breathalyzer is used.
Not the least of which are some of the most common factors I have
noted over the years in training and in actual hands-on experience.
False readings on a breathalyzer can sometimes be caused by:

User error – if the technician is not trained well or makes an error
this can lead to false results.

Improper or outdated calibration – this can cause the machine to show
an inaccurate result.

Misconduct – some of the less technical breath testing devices can be
manipulated to show a false reading if an unscrupulous officer chose
to do that. It is rare, but we’d be less the honest if we didn’t
recognize the fact that anything dishonest that has a potential to
occur, probably does from time to time.

Monitor time – (this is important) routinely a subject is monitored
for 15-20 minutes to allow any residual alcohol vapors that might be
in the mouth to dissipate prior to taking the test (if you are not
given this time the results can come into question) to make sure he
does not do any of the following:

Alcohol – A breathalyzer is designed to sample the air in your lungs,
thereby measuring the alcohol content of the blood. If you have
alcohol lingering in your mouth from recent drinking this can drive
the results higher than the actual blood alcohol content.

Vomit – regurgitating an alcoholic beverage from the stomach into the
mouth in close proximity to test time can interfere with the test
results. Again, this will cause the machine to measure unabsorbed, and
undigested alcohol that returns to the mouth from the stomach that
would not otherwise be measured in a sample of air from the lungs.

Reflux – belching an alcoholic beverage immediately prior to the test
can also affect the test results. As with the others above, the
machine will register fumes or liquid alcohol that is belched up from
the stomach rather that only measuring the air in the lungs and an
increased reading will often result.

Certain medications – particularly medicines that contain alcohol
(like cough syrup, cold medication, elixirs, mouthwash, breath
freshener, inhalers, etc) can adversely affect the test results.

Smoking – smoking immediately before a test can also lead to
questionable results.

Certain equipment – giving the test in close proximity to ion
generators (like the kind used as air cleaners) and central HVAC
electronic filtration systems can cause problems.

Diabetes – diabetics often emit a fruity, wine-like odor from their
mouths and on their breath, especially during a severe diabetic
episode, and this is sometimes mistaken for drunkenness. While a
diabetic may even exhibit all the symptoms of intoxication due to his
condition, including unsteadiness, slurred speech and confusion,
diabetes alone usually doesn’t cause you to register alcohol content
except in some rare instances where machines have been known to pick
up an abnormally high levels of ketones and register that as an
alcohol reading.

ASK THE DIABETES TEAM
http://www.childrenwithdiabetes.com/dte ... 0d_9je.htm

Mistaking a diabetic for a drunk driver used to be much more common
until it was identified some years ago and now most officers are
trained to watch for this medical condition if the breathalyzer shows
no reading, as it can be a serious medical threat.

Some food, candies and gum have also been known to cause problems with
the breath test, but it should be noted that there are several
different kinds of breathalyzer machines, each with it’s own
sensitivities. Some of them are a bit more technically advanced than
others. A recent study at John’s Hopkins suggests that extensive
exposure to Gasoline additives can also cause the device to produce an
inaccurate reading:

GASOLINE ADDITIVE INTERFERES WITH ALCOHOL BREATH ANALYZERS
http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/ ... 121901.php


You may also have heard that eating garlic, peanuts or putting a penny
in your mouth will lower the results of a breathalyzer, but I assure
you that this is a myth and will get you arrested if you are relying
on these methods to conceal the fact you have been drinking.

The detecting of high levels of ketones also means anyone the heavily dieting will give a false reading as well.

[Harrison]

Thank God someone fucking knows what they're talking about.

I'm sick of you wannabe know-it-alls googling shit for 2 seconds then coming back and spouting off your ignorance.

[Diekan]

Here's an idea...








Don't be a moron and drink and drive.

[brinstar]

Thank God someone fucking knows what they're talking about.

I'm sick of you wannabe know-it-alls googling shit for 2 seconds then coming back and spouting off your ignorance.

hey guess what

with the exception of the diabetes thing, all of those anomalies are accounted for:

the officer first asks you if you are taking any medications as well as what you ate and when. then the officer monitors you for 15 minutes before administering the test, AND if at any point during that 15 minutes you belch or vomit you start the 15 minutes over. you are also not allowed to smoke either. also this 15 minutes allows for anything you recently drank to be more or less accounted for in your breath (i.e. if you slam a shot of jack (by which i mean jack daniels, not some faggy backwoods apple moonshine) right before you test, you'll blow a 1.7 which is four times the FATAL limit).

and then guess what else?? yeah, that's right, the PBT (field-test unit) is only usable for determining probably cause for a DWI arrest. if you blow high enough, they haul your ass in to test on the BIG BOY, the intoxilyzer 5000, which unlike the PBT is accurate enough for use in prosecution.

so basically, barring officer dishonesty or extreme circumstances, you are COMPLETELY FUCKING WRONG. take your hotshot internet attitude and go argue somewhere else about a topic you actually know something about.

EDIT:

oh btw i just realized martrae's cut-and-paste agrees with ME, not you. here, i'll bold what i mean:

Monitor time – (this is important) routinely a subject is monitored
for 15-20 minutes to allow any residual alcohol vapors that might be
in the mouth to dissipate prior to taking the test (if you are not
given this time the results can come into question) to make sure he
does not do any of the following:

Alcohol – A breathalyzer is designed to sample the air in your lungs,
thereby measuring the alcohol content of the blood. If you have
alcohol lingering in your mouth from recent drinking this can drive
the results higher than the actual blood alcohol content.

Vomit – regurgitating an alcoholic beverage from the stomach into the
mouth in close proximity to test time can interfere with the test
results. Again, this will cause the machine to measure unabsorbed, and
undigested alcohol that returns to the mouth from the stomach that
would not otherwise be measured in a sample of air from the lungs.

Reflux – belching an alcoholic beverage immediately prior to the test
can also affect the test results. As with the others above, the
machine will register fumes or liquid alcohol that is belched up from
the stomach rather that only measuring the air in the lungs and an
increased reading will often result.

Certain medications – particularly medicines that contain alcohol
(like cough syrup, cold medication, elixirs, mouthwash, breath
freshener, inhalers, etc) can adversely affect the test results.

Smoking – smoking immediately before a test can also lead to
questionable results.

[Aryylas]

Your arguing the semantics of shit in someone's mouth.

[brinstar]

no, i'm arguing that harrison doesn't know shit about what he's talking about

(although i'd say the argument is pretty much over now)

[Martrae]

Actually, Brin, Fin's first statement was about the guy wouldn't attempted it if he understood how breathalyzers worked...so in that regard, you're both right.

[brinstar]

i'd have agreed with him there. but then he went on to argue that breathalyzers "don't measure alcohol on breath like people think" and that "breathalyzers are so inaccurate it is stupid" and "it doesn't narrow down the variables at all" which are all laughably wrong. and then he goes and calls everyone else "wannabe know-it-alls"?