Now, I know I am old.

Sidle up to the bar (Lightly Moderated)

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Now, I know I am old.

Postby The Kizzy » Fri Apr 22, 2005 10:45 am

So after work last night, the girls invited me to a club called Slam Jams. They wanted to go dancing. I wasn't in the mood to go, but this is the first time since I started working there that I had been invited out. I didn't want to seem like a bitch. So I went. We got there, and the place is pretty dead. So we sit at the bar, and I ordered a drink, and we all just chit chatted about ex's and what losers they were. The bar is in a very nice area of town, but around midnight all of these "gangsta thugs" started pouring in. No big deal, but I swear one of the girls I was with is a magnet for black men. The fact that she had went to high school with alot of them kept them coming over and talking to her. She is a very pretty girl, and she has a very large butt. Not fat, just large and shapely. One I think Dieken would like. Anyway.......so this one guy walks over to my friend, and just grabs her crotch, she got all mad, and told him to back off. So he did it again, so I knocked his hand away, and told him to learn some respect for women. So he walked away, only to come back a short time later to grab my ass.....BIG MISTAKE. I stood up and shoved him back into a bunch of guys. When I stood up his eyes got as big as saucers and he took off. (He was about 5'4") He didn't bother us for a while. I had another drink, and when the rest of the girls from work showed up and we went to the dance floor. Well this guy comes back around, and starts dancing with my friend from behind. She got all freaked out and asked me to do something. So I took her arm, and moved her to the other side of me. So the black guy gets all pissy again, and calls me a bitch. So I shoved him again, this time into the wall. Security came over and I told them they should teach the boys at the club some respect. Afterwards everyone was laughing and telling people I took care of the light work. I just wanted to go home. I was not having a good time being groped. I guess I'm getting old.
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Postby Themosticles » Fri Apr 22, 2005 11:08 am

I know lots of guys are really forward but that shit is over the line.
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Postby Jei » Fri Apr 22, 2005 11:09 am

typical black guy club behavior. white guys that want to be black are the same way, at least at the clubs around here

its pretty sad that some people have to pretty much rape a chick to get/touch some ass
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Postby Jimmy Durante » Fri Apr 22, 2005 11:51 am

Kizzy, that has nothing to do with being old. It has everything to do with the type of establishment you decide to spend your evening at.
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Postby Martrae » Fri Apr 22, 2005 11:55 am

So not wanting someone you don't know to grab your private parts makes you old? Sign me up for the retirement home! ;)

I agree with Schnozzola, it was the nasty place you guys went to.
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Re: Now, I know I am old.

Postby Captain Insano » Fri Apr 22, 2005 11:56 am

Kizzy wrote: black men.




there's the problem. You'd have been treated better at the gorilla exhibit at the zoo. They are more civilized to say the least.
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Postby fefn » Fri Apr 22, 2005 12:00 pm

lolz ^^
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Postby Ginzburgh » Fri Apr 22, 2005 12:05 pm

Hey, you grab 100 crotches you'll probably get denied 99 times...but there is always that 1...
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Postby vonkaar » Fri Apr 22, 2005 12:50 pm

short guys are awesome

it would have been a much better story if he waited for you outside and when you were alone, he swung a punch at you and then you caught it and crushed the bones in his hand like you were a T-1000 terminator and had superhuman strength but you are already really tall and so a little 5'4" dude would already be intimidated but anyway if after crushing his hand he grabbed a tire iron and swung it at your face hard enough to partially expose your titanium skeleton with glowing red eyes he would probably freak out but you still have his pulverized hand in your grip so he can't really run away so he keeps trying to swing it at your exposed metal-face while screaming like a girl but then you start laughing in a creepily human laugh and grab the tire iron from his other hand and then bend it into a heart with one hand all the while laughing and so now he has nothing with which to fight you off and he just saw you bend solid iron and that would easily be enough to scare away normally-sized men but this guy is a little runt and probably has a chip on his shoulder and works out all the time because hell, if you can't grow vertically at least you can have big biceps and be an asshole to all the normally-sized men but anyway he's still sitting there, I mean standing there, with one hand all crushed like crushed ice and the other hand weaponless and all he wants now is to go back in time and tell himself to leave that poor big-assed friend of yours alone because look where he's at now - sitting, I mean standing, in front of a 6'3" terminator woman who's about to beat the fuck out of him and now all he can do is pray which is what he does and that makes you angry because you are a cyborg and they don't believe in god which is a lot like Tossica but Tossica is a ninja DJ and wouldn't cry and pray like this little half-man so you take your anti-God anger out on him by throwing him down to the ground and stepping on his skull until his miniature-man brains squirt out of his ears like a squished plum would if it had a hard boney exterior like his skull well in that case more like if you stepped on a rat because a rat actually has bones that would make a more appropriate sound than that from a plum which obviously has no bones to snap - only red skin (or black if you prefer black plums).

Anyway, he got what was coming to him and that's all that matters.
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Postby Harrison » Fri Apr 22, 2005 12:57 pm

Should have beat his ass plain and simple. That's ridiculous.
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Apr 22, 2005 1:54 pm

vonkaar wrote:short guys are awesome

it would have been a much better story if he waited for you outside and when you were alone, he swung a punch at you and then you caught it and crushed the bones in his hand like you were a T-1000 terminator and had superhuman strength but you are already really tall and so a little 5'4" dude would already be intimidated but anyway if after crushing his hand he grabbed a tire iron and swung it at your face hard enough to partially expose your titanium skeleton with glowing red eyes he would probably freak out but you still have his pulverized hand in your grip so he can't really run away so he keeps trying to swing it at your exposed metal-face while screaming like a girl but then you start laughing in a creepily human laugh and grab the tire iron from his other hand and then bend it into a heart with one hand all the while laughing and so now he has nothing with which to fight you off and he just saw you bend solid iron and that would easily be enough to scare away normally-sized men but this guy is a little runt and probably has a chip on his shoulder and works out all the time because hell, if you can't grow vertically at least you can have big biceps and be an asshole to all the normally-sized men but anyway he's still sitting there, I mean standing there, with one hand all crushed like crushed ice and the other hand weaponless and all he wants now is to go back in time and tell himself to leave that poor big-assed friend of yours alone because look where he's at now - sitting, I mean standing, in front of a 6'3" terminator woman who's about to beat the fuck out of him and now all he can do is pray which is what he does and that makes you angry because you are a cyborg and they don't believe in god which is a lot like Tossica but Tossica is a ninja DJ and wouldn't cry and pray like this little half-man so you take your anti-God anger out on him by throwing him down to the ground and stepping on his skull until his miniature-man brains squirt out of his ears like a squished plum would if it had a hard boney exterior like his skull well in that case more like if you stepped on a rat because a rat actually has bones that would make a more appropriate sound than that from a plum which obviously has no bones to snap - only red skin (or black if you prefer black plums).

Anyway, he got what was coming to him and that's all that matters.


That's exactly what happened, but I didn't want to brag. Were you there?

:lol:
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Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Gypsiyee » Fri Apr 22, 2005 2:21 pm

I skimmed Vonk's paragraph for punctuation first, then decided it would probably be best that I didn't read it.

PS- WTFG Kizzy. Doesn't make you old - I'm 21 and I prefer my crotch and ass untouched by nasty men who think 'bitches and hos' are there for their desires only.
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Postby Malluas » Fri Apr 22, 2005 2:21 pm

i refuse to go to decent size parties and clubs. last one i went to ended up in some guy gettin stabbed for accidentally bumping into some black dude.

But if you were wearing high heels you should have took one off and then implant it in his brain
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Postby araby » Fri Apr 22, 2005 2:29 pm

I was groped once at a party, and I turned around, looked at the guy and said, "You don't have permission to do that."

beware of Araby hahahaha...I'm such a little wimp :rofl:
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Postby IgraineShedra » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:03 pm

If you were getting old, probably wouldn't have gotten the attention, no?
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:03 pm

As in old, I meant, I didn't have a good time or enjoy the bar.
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Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby IgraineShedra » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:05 pm

that just means it's a crappy bar
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Postby Captain Insano » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:29 pm

Gypsiyee wrote: I prefer my crotch touched



this quickest way to my heart is to have my crotch touched by a woman I don't know.
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Get rid of the pictures of the goofy looking white guy. That opens two right there.

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Postby brinstar » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:37 pm

Araby wrote:I was groped once at a party, and I turned around, looked at the guy and said, "You don't have permission to do that."


lol that's totally something you would say
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Postby Jimmy Durante » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:41 pm

Malluas wrote:i refuse to go to decent size parties and clubs.


Ditto. I've been dragged out to the big clubs and I didn't enjoy myself one iota, not to mention the occasional Phillistines who need to be carried out on a stretcher (Soundfactory did have nice music, however). If I need to get frisked to gain entrance, I'll quietly go someplace else to spend my evening.

I'll take dive bars and Irish pubs with live folk music. Thanks.
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Apr 22, 2005 6:33 pm

Jimmy Durante wrote:
Malluas wrote:i refuse to go to decent size parties and clubs.


Ditto. I've been dragged out to the big clubs and I didn't enjoy myself one iota, not to mention the occasional Phillistines who need to be carried out on a stretcher (Soundfactory did have nice music, however). If I need to get frisked to gain entrance, I'll quietly go someplace else to spend my evening.

I'll take dive bars and Irish pubs with live folk music. Thanks.


Oddly enough, I think I agree with you on that part.
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Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Martrae » Fri Apr 22, 2005 8:17 pm

I love Jellyrolls in Atlanta. Any other place is bleh...
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