How the world was REALLY created

Sidle up to the bar (Lightly Moderated)

Moderator: Dictators in Training

How the world was REALLY created

Postby The Kizzy » Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:08 pm

EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY


After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve.
"So, how is everything going?" inquired God.
"It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem.
It's these breasts you have given me.
The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly
knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and
snagging them on bushes.
They're a real pain," reported Eve.

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body
came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. she felt that having
only two breasts might leave her body more symmetrically balanced.

"That's a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this,
you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed
only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away."

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the
bushes. Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden
of Eden

"Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?" "Just fantastic," she replied,
"But for one oversight. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has
a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel
so alone."

God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right. How could I
have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man
from a part of you. Now let's see............
where did I put the useless boob?"


Now doesn't THAT make more sense than that stuff about the rib?
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
User avatar
The Kizzy
NT Patron
NT Patron
 
Posts: 15193
Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 9:48 pm
Location: In the closet with the ghosts

Postby Adivina » Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:10 pm

:rofl: :rofl:

<3 to you~
Donnel wrote:
Erodalak wrote:Who needs an education when you are hawt like advina

fixt :P
User avatar
Adivina
NT Deity
NT Deity
 
Posts: 4929
Joined: Tue Mar 09, 2004 7:06 pm

Postby Jay » Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:14 pm

Funny how a leftover boob makes more money a year for doing the same work on average than the favored creation of god.
Jay

 

Postby Donnel » Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:14 pm

:ohsnap:
<a href="http://wow.allakhazam.com/profile.html?384300">Treston</a>
Donnel
NT Traveller
NT Traveller
 
Posts: 2126
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2004 9:00 am

Postby The Kizzy » Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:29 pm

there you go generalizing again, you must be really insecure to continue doing that
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
User avatar
The Kizzy
NT Patron
NT Patron
 
Posts: 15193
Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 9:48 pm
Location: In the closet with the ghosts

Postby Aatrex » Tue Jan 03, 2006 2:05 pm

So God makes Adam and Adam walks through Eden, simply existing. But things in Eden get a little slow so God says, "Adam, for you I will create a woman." Adam is interested.

"She will be everything you could possibly want in a woman, she will be beautiful, professionally and financially successful, a great mother and awesome in bed."

God has Adam's full attention. Adam wonders what he has done to fall under such good graces. "But," God says, "It's going to cost you an arm and a leg."

Adam stops and thinks,

"Well God, that sound like a pretty good deal but what can I get for a rib?"
User avatar
Aatrex
NT Disciple
NT Disciple
 
Posts: 625
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2004 3:50 pm
Location: Ohio

Postby DangerPaul » Tue Jan 03, 2006 2:07 pm

haw
User avatar
DangerPaul
Nappy Headed Ho
Nappy Headed Ho
 
Posts: 6582
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2004 12:36 pm

Postby Darcler » Tue Jan 03, 2006 2:09 pm

Erodalak wrote:Funny how a leftover boob makes more money a year for doing the same work on average than the favored creation of god.


And he is right. Not generalizing when you say on average. If he left that out, you could say that.
User avatar
Darcler
Saran Wrap Princess
Saran Wrap Princess
 
Posts: 7161
Joined: Thu Jun 17, 2004 10:54 pm
Location: Dallas, TX

Postby Tuggan » Tue Jan 03, 2006 2:27 pm

Aatrex wrote:So God makes Adam and Adam walks through Eden, simply existing. But things in Eden get a little slow so God says, "Adam, for you I will create a woman." Adam is interested.

"She will be everything you could possibly want in a woman, she will be beautiful, professionally and financially successful, a great mother and awesome in bed."

God has Adam's full attention. Adam wonders what he has done to fall under such good graces. "But," God says, "It's going to cost you an arm and a leg."

Adam stops and thinks,

"Well God, that sound like a pretty good deal but what can I get for a rib?"


this one is alot better.
Tuggan
NT Traveller
NT Traveller
 
Posts: 3900
Joined: Fri Mar 12, 2004 3:12 am
Location: Michigan

Postby Kramer » Tue Jan 03, 2006 4:23 pm

boys rule. girls drool.
Mindia is seriously the greatest troll that has ever lived.
    User avatar
    Kramer
    NT Traveller
    NT Traveller
     
    Posts: 3397
    Joined: Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:50 pm
    Location: tha doity sowf

    Postby Arlos » Tue Jan 03, 2006 4:49 pm

    Men are stupid, women are evil.

    -Arlos
    User avatar
    Arlos
    Admin Abuse Squad
    Admin Abuse Squad
     
    Posts: 9021
    Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 12:39 pm

    Postby Adivina » Tue Jan 03, 2006 6:08 pm

    They were both funny~
    Donnel wrote:
    Erodalak wrote:Who needs an education when you are hawt like advina

    fixt :P
    User avatar
    Adivina
    NT Deity
    NT Deity
     
    Posts: 4929
    Joined: Tue Mar 09, 2004 7:06 pm


    Return to Cap's Alehouse

    Who is online

    Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 22 guests