Moderator: Tossica
Ginzburgh wrote:Right.
Here is how it would go if I had a friend in a similar predicament:
Friend, "This guy raped me and I am still friends with him"
Ginz, "Hmm...Maybe that isn't a good idea. You probably shouldn't talk to him anymore"
Friend, "I've got it under control"
Ginz, "okey dokey...anyway <insert a different conversation here>"
Then it would never be spoken of again. I certainly wouldn't come on an internet message board looking for ideas to launch an elaborate scheme to remove the guy from her life. That is what can be commonly referred to as, "looking for trouble". Or "meddling" in the Scooby Doo tongue.
Leave it alone.
Or how about maybe the guy was young and stupid, had a weak moment, took advantage of a young girl in a way he shouldn't have and now it haunts him every day...which is why he has been trying to make ammends all these years.
Either way, Jay shouldn't be involved unless she asks him to be, which it seems like she doesn't.
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
Jay wrote:Ginzburgh wrote:Right.
Here is how it would go if I had a friend in a similar predicament:
Friend, "This guy raped me and I am still friends with him"
Ginz, "Hmm...Maybe that isn't a good idea. You probably shouldn't talk to him anymore"
Friend, "I've got it under control"
Ginz, "okey dokey...anyway <insert a different conversation here>"
Then it would never be spoken of again. I certainly wouldn't come on an internet message board looking for ideas to launch an elaborate scheme to remove the guy from her life. That is what can be commonly referred to as, "looking for trouble". Or "meddling" in the Scooby Doo tongue.
Leave it alone.
Or how about maybe the guy was young and stupid, had a weak moment, took advantage of a young girl in a way he shouldn't have and now it haunts him every day...which is why he has been trying to make ammends all these years.
Either way, Jay shouldn't be involved unless she asks him to be, which it seems like she doesn't.
I guess I worded it wrong. I'm not trying to set up an elaborate series of events or anything, I just want her to confront her problems. I see what you're saying and I even said that I know it's not really my problem but the reason we're close is because we don't have families to turn so we just support each other. I've had issues that she's "meddled" in and in the end I came out of them better because she did. My journey to where I am now would have been either extremely more difficult or wouldn't have happened had she not been around.
Also, I see it like this, I can either sit there and listen to her cry about how she keeps ruining her relationships and tell her over and over again that it'll be all right, or I can convince her to make it happen. In the end if she chooses not to do anything then I can always turn my back but until then I have to at least try to positively influence the situation. I assume that as my responsibility as a friend since I've already agreed to be there for her like she was for me.
Yeah I know it's voluntarily engaging myself in drama, but I choose to protect the few close people I have in my life and watching her suffer for the entire time or losing her as a friend entirely would suck more than voicing my frustration on the subject and urging her to find a solution.
10sun wrote:Jay wrote:Ginzburgh wrote:Right.
Here is how it would go if I had a friend in a similar predicament:
Friend, "This guy raped me and I am still friends with him"
Ginz, "Hmm...Maybe that isn't a good idea. You probably shouldn't talk to him anymore"
Friend, "I've got it under control"
Ginz, "okey dokey...anyway <insert a different conversation here>"
Then it would never be spoken of again. I certainly wouldn't come on an internet message board looking for ideas to launch an elaborate scheme to remove the guy from her life. That is what can be commonly referred to as, "looking for trouble". Or "meddling" in the Scooby Doo tongue.
Leave it alone.
Or how about maybe the guy was young and stupid, had a weak moment, took advantage of a young girl in a way he shouldn't have and now it haunts him every day...which is why he has been trying to make ammends all these years.
Either way, Jay shouldn't be involved unless she asks him to be, which it seems like she doesn't.
I guess I worded it wrong. I'm not trying to set up an elaborate series of events or anything, I just want her to confront her problems. I see what you're saying and I even said that I know it's not really my problem but the reason we're close is because we don't have families to turn so we just support each other. I've had issues that she's "meddled" in and in the end I came out of them better because she did. My journey to where I am now would have been either extremely more difficult or wouldn't have happened had she not been around.
Also, I see it like this, I can either sit there and listen to her cry about how she keeps ruining her relationships and tell her over and over again that it'll be all right, or I can convince her to make it happen. In the end if she chooses not to do anything then I can always turn my back but until then I have to at least try to positively influence the situation. I assume that as my responsibility as a friend since I've already agreed to be there for her like she was for me.
Yeah I know it's voluntarily engaging myself in drama, but I choose to protect the few close people I have in my life and watching her suffer for the entire time or losing her as a friend entirely would suck more than voicing my frustration on the subject and urging her to find a solution.
Stick it in her butt.
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
Insanityfair wrote:Lueyen wrote:How evil are you willing to get Jay?
Oh no you don't!
Raymond S. Kraft wrote:The history of the world is the history of civilizational clashes, cultural clashes. All wars are about ideas, ideas about what society and civilization should be like, and the most determined always win.
Those who are willing to be the most ruthless always win. The pacifists always lose, because the anti-pacifists kill them.
Lueyen wrote:Insanityfair wrote:Lueyen wrote:How evil are you willing to get Jay?
Oh no you don't!
It was just a question.
Raymond S. Kraft wrote:The history of the world is the history of civilizational clashes, cultural clashes. All wars are about ideas, ideas about what society and civilization should be like, and the most determined always win.
Those who are willing to be the most ruthless always win. The pacifists always lose, because the anti-pacifists kill them.
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
HyPhY GhEtTo MaMi wrote:GeT ofF mAh OvaRiEz
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
leah wrote:i am forever grateful to my gym teacher for drilling that skill into me during drivers' ed
leah wrote:isn't the only difference the length? i feel like it would take too long to smoke something that long, ha.
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