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Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:26 pm
by Darcler
I detest keyloggers with every fiber of my being.

HEY my son just rolled over!

Anyway, there is very little way to quietly scream I DONT TRUST YOU than to install a keylogger for spying purposes. There is no reason for them, a conversation an a little honesty goes a whole lot further.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:27 pm
by Lueyen
http://www.neuber.com/taskmanager/index.html

I found that to be a decent program for showing all tasks including those hidden from windows task manager. It's shareware, but you have 30 days of free use.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:30 pm
by Menlaan
That's part of the issue. He's from an abusive family and is very bad about expressing his feelings. She's repeatedly tried to talk to him and it's been tough. He also refuses to admit that he's spying on her even when he has actually sent her friends emails from HER account. It's pretty obvious he broke into her email account, I'm just not sure what else he's done. For what it's worth, I understand why he would want to spy on her, but she's now been pretty open to him, and I think it would be helpful if they could just put everything on the table and talk about it. Since that's not happening right now, she has to do it on her own.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:30 pm
by Harrison
So she should just cheat on him, I see the logic :ugh:

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:32 pm
by Darcler
exactly :ugh:

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:34 pm
by Gypsiyee
No offense to you by any means Harrison, but your sleuthing is nothing to be excited about considering it's pretty self explanatory why anyone would flip out about the person they spend their lives with reading their email - if it's that big of a deal there's usually only 1 reason, because in a good marriage you're generally going to know any types of emails your partner is going to get anyway. It also has nothing to do with women, men are just as guilty - stereotyping it as only mistrusting women is very Diekan-esque.

I was in a similar situation as this lady, and it's a very hard situation - in my situation Scott knew about it because we had talked about how good enough wasn't ok anymore and that I was still in love with someone else - it's a difficult situation when you really care about the person you're with and could easily have an ok life with them, it's just a hard decision to make. I mean I don't know any details of her situation and I wouldn't refer to Scott as a douche because sure, I still care about him, but to me what it kind of sounds like is she's looking for an excuse to get out of her current relationship and chase after the one she really wants, but instead of looking for a good reason to break up her marriage she needs to just be honest - spying on each other is just going to make it worse. As far as the virtual prison thing, I have no sympathy - you shouldn't be hiding stuff from your husband and he has every right to put her in a virtual prison if she's cheating on him.

I can sympathize with the difficulty of her problem if she still cares about her husband, but either way she needs to be honest with him and not try to just pass all the blame off on him - it isn't fair to either man if she can't figure out what she wants and holding onto that kind of selfishness is just going to make her lose them both, which she'll deserve 100% if she doesn't get her shit in order.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:39 pm
by Harrison
It wasn't sleuthing or stereotyping, it was the truth.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:43 pm
by Gypsiyee
If you live your whole life waiting for someone to let you down, you're going to be one lonely miserable old man.

Not trusting an entire group of people due to your minimal experiences with the tiniest fraction of the entire population of them IS stereotyping.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:50 pm
by Harrison
I think it's pretty much a given that I will be a lonely old man. I've accepted this.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 2:52 pm
by Narrock
Harrison wrote:I think it's pretty much a given that I will be a lonely old man. I've accepted this.


Touche! I don't trust women all that much either... been burned too many times in the past.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:03 pm
by Tikker
Darcler wrote:
At any rate, a lot of newer keyloggers are completely invisable to every program, so no matter what she installs, it might not pick up.


nothing is completely invisible, ever

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:10 pm
by Menlaan
As a quick update, no key loggers were found using Mindia's software, so she feels better that he's at least not monitoring her anymore. Now she's also not planning on contacting the former guy (or so she says, but I only found out about all this last night so I might have also misunderstood her intentions). I think she just felt boxed in, and now she feels more relieved. We'll see what happens. She has her dissertation defense next week, so I probably won't hear more for a while.

Thanks for all the advice!

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:16 pm
by Darcler
Tikker wrote:
Darcler wrote:
At any rate, a lot of newer keyloggers are completely invisable to every program, so no matter what she installs, it might not pick up.


nothing is completely invisible, ever


For a normal user, yes, invisable.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:21 pm
by 10sun
Menlaan wrote:As a quick update, no key loggers were found using Mindia's software, so she feels better that he's at least not monitoring her anymore. Now she's also not planning on contacting the former guy (or so she says, but I only found out about all this last night so I might have also misunderstood her intentions). I think she just felt boxed in, and now she feels more relieved. We'll see what happens. She has her dissertation defense next week, so I probably won't hear more for a while.

Thanks for all the advice!


Moral of the story: Guilt makes you paranoid.

What was it? The Telltale Heart by Edgar Allen Poe?

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:58 pm
by Harrison
Yeah...

I say she's just fucking nuts. I bet she's like late 20's and off her rocker.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:30 pm
by Menlaan
Well, he did send her friends emails from her account during a 2 day period where her password was changed (and then mysteriously changed back after she vigorously confronted him; he told her to "clear her cookies" and that that was the problem).

She is in fact 30, but not crazy. She's actually incredibly intelligent and educated. Not that that prevents you from being off your rocker, but you'll just have to trust me that she's not crazy. I've known her for the past 15 years.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:32 pm
by Jay
Menlaan wrote:Well, he did send her friends emails from her account during a 2 day period where her password was changed (and then mysteriously changed back after she vigorously confronted him; he told her to "clear her cookies" and that that was the problem).

She is in fact 30, and I want to fuck her brains out until jizz shoots out of her tear ducts and nostrils.


fixt

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:34 pm
by kinghooter00
Tikker wrote:
Menlaan wrote:Just helping a friend. The guy is a douche-bag anyway. So.. would installing spy-bot pick up on it?


if she's cheating, she's a douche bag too

I have pretty much zero tolerance for people who fuck around while in relationships


Tikker, every once and a while you say some good things.

This would be one of them

you've earned this emoticon

:google:

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:34 pm
by Trielelvan
You should tell her to leave her husband so you can put it in her butt.

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:35 pm
by Menlaan
Haha

EDIT -- b/c of the ninja posters, my haha was in reference to Jay, not Captain Google

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:37 pm
by Harrison
Trielelvan wrote:You should tell her to leave her husband so you can put it in her butt.


<3

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:37 pm
by kinghooter00
i'm a prick though, so i'd get one if i saw my chick on Aim too much.... J/k.... No i'm not....damn i'm an asshole... :wink:

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 6:29 pm
by araby
wtf is this thread all about. I am so guilty my paranoia won't go away for even a second. is this thread about me?? ISN'T EVERYTHING ABOUT ME??!
30/f/crazy

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 6:35 pm
by Gargamellow
gypsi is right..don't dwell on the past..don't fear the future..live in the moment and appreciate what you have

lord knows im trying to

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 6:55 pm
by Tossica
Bitches is all crazy. How much crazy are YOU willing to put up with? That's the question.