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It was the earth all along!

Postby Donnel » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:31 pm

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2002413830_monkeys01.html

Monday, August 1, 2005 - Page updated at 12:00 AM

Monkeys threaten San Juan

By Ray Quintanilla

TOA BAJA, Puerto Rico — When hordes of monkeys began invading Puerto Rico's agricultural fields, devastating crops and eluding capture, the major concern was trapping them before they reached urban areas, where they would pose a public health hazard and be nearly impossible to round up.

Fear is turning to outrage. Authorities recently acknowledged a clan of these pesky moneys, escapees from defunct medical-research laboratories along Puerto Rico's southern coast, has turned up just 20 minutes outside metropolitan San Juan — home to 1.5 million residents and a virtually unlimited number of hiding places.

"It would be very bad if these monkeys got to San Juan," said Jose Chalbert, director of Puerto Rico's Department of Natural Resources, an agency that recently proposed capturing the wild monkeys because they carry diseases.

"I don't even want to think about having to trap monkeys there," Chalbert said, adding that money for his $3 million effort to trap the monkeys is being held up amid all the fighting going on in the legislature.

Primates are not native to Puerto Rico. But the island has been home to a species of monkey dating back to the 1950s when scientists brought them here for medical experiments.

The animals — descendants of the patas and rhesus monkeys that escaped from medical-research labs — are known to be fertile and aggressive.

Mature monkeys can weigh up to 50 pounds, and it's estimated the monkey population in southeast Puerto Rico stands at between 1,000 and 2,000 — and it's growing every day.

No one knows how many primates live in and around Toa Baja, a small agricultural community just west of San Juan.

Elias Sanchez, a top assistant to Toa Baja's mayor, said the city is trying to address the problem. But the trapping and control of the population is beyond the scope of any local community.

"The island's government should be helping," he said, adding that the population of monkeys is "very small."

Residents insist dozens of them have taken up residence near Toa Baja's municipal dump. Inside the landfill they forage for food and then they explore nearby neighborhoods, frightening residents.

Emma Vasquez, who lives next to the landfill, said a baby monkey once jumped from a tree onto the roof of her house.

"At first we all thought it was cute," said Vasquez, 60. "Then it started tipping over all of my plants in the balcony and growling at me."

When she called police, authorities from the island's natural-resource department showed up wearing white body suits and masks to protect themselves. "That scared me even more," she said.

The monkey eventually was sedated and then removed from her roof.

In another incident, Wilberto Cerrano said he has seen about 15 monkeys as close as 200 yards from his home "swinging in the trees and running around, like they are happy as can be."

Cerrano said he doesn't think the animals will make their way into San Juan. "They don't like people. They keep their distance," Cerrano, 55, said.



Those damn dirty apes!
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Postby Zanchief » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:34 pm

I blame Heston.
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Postby Tuggan » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:37 pm

fuck no, if he had his way these monkeys would all be on the receiving end of a barrel.
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Postby The Kizzy » Wed Aug 03, 2005 2:20 pm

Tuggan wrote:fuck no, if he had his way these monkeys would all be on the receiving end of a barrel.


/agree. I wouldn't have laughed while watching a monkey swinging from my tree to my roof, I would have had target practice. Be warned, I am an excellent shot, or at least I was in boot camp.
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Postby Minrott » Wed Aug 03, 2005 2:34 pm

omfg this is my dream come true.

Give me a Benelli M1 and lots of #4 buck and I will kill fucking monkies all day. Every day, for the rest of my life.


"reee reee reee" BLAM!

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Postby The Kizzy » Wed Aug 03, 2005 2:37 pm

hehe
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Martrae » Wed Aug 03, 2005 3:43 pm

Why am I suddenly thinking of the Christopher Snow books?
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Postby Narrock » Wed Aug 03, 2005 4:53 pm

Kizzy wrote:
Tuggan wrote:fuck no, if he had his way these monkeys would all be on the receiving end of a barrel.


/agree. I wouldn't have laughed while watching a monkey swinging from my tree to my roof, I would have had target practice. Be warned, I am an excellent shot, or at least I was in boot camp.


hehe me too Kizz. I have a ribbon for excellent marksmanship from the Air Force boot camp.
“The more I study science the more I believe in God.” -- Albert Einstein
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Postby veeneedefeesh » Wed Aug 03, 2005 8:59 pm

Air Force? that explains the sig
A man can only live twice, once when he is born, and once when he has looked death in the eye~~~~Japanese Proverb

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Postby Narrock » Wed Aug 03, 2005 10:43 pm

veeneedefeesh wrote:Air Force? that explains the sig


What's wrong with the Air Force? Here's a little known factoid about the Air Force. You think the Navy Seals or the Marines Recon and Force Recon, or Army Rangers go in first? Wrong. Read this:

http://usmilitary.about.com/cs/airforce ... eyrole.htm

Sorry for the thread derailment, but I had to address Veenee's stupid comment.
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Postby Darcler » Thu Aug 04, 2005 12:26 am

I didnt read it.
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Postby Martrae » Thu Aug 04, 2005 7:28 am

Considering in another thread Venee said your sig was gaytastic and in this one he said the Air Force explains your sig....

Like I said in another thread....I really hope you pay more attention when you read the bible but the evidence is to the contrary.
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Postby Donnel » Thu Aug 04, 2005 8:03 am

Hey you guys, get out of my funny monkey thread!
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Postby Martrae » Thu Aug 04, 2005 9:26 am

Image
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Postby The Kizzy » Thu Aug 04, 2005 9:31 am

Martrae is trolling!!!! I'm telling!!!
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Martrae » Thu Aug 04, 2005 9:46 am

Nuh uh....I merely added another funny monkey!
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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