BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush has successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more than double its original selling price of $11,250,000.
"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America will be stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with French Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of Louisiana in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."
The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of billions of dollars to rebuild.
"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said Bush. "He and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water, and make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of work to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix it."
The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents of Louisiana.
"Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly yum kom drabby sham!"
However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by Republicans.
"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and billions, and billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made 25 million dollars in pure profit."
"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume. "Not only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money on the deal. Plus, when the god-awful French are done fixing it up, we can easily invade and take it back again."
The money gained from 'The Louisiana Refund' is expected to be immediately pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
Oh god, I'm gonna get this forwarded to me in email by people who think it's legit, sorta like Congress taxing email, or the dangers of dihydrogenmonoxoide.
But yea it funny 8).
Raymond S. Kraft wrote:The history of the world is the history of civilizational clashes, cultural clashes. All wars are about ideas, ideas about what society and civilization should be like, and the most determined always win.
Those who are willing to be the most ruthless always win. The pacifists always lose, because the anti-pacifists kill them.
But seriously, Bush's speech last night. Roosevelt and LBJ were standing behind him, like Yoda, Anakin and Obi Wan smiling at Luke.
Jesse Jackson couldve written parts of that speech. Could not believe it. Only a Republican could get away with it. A land giveaway for poor blacks? God, not even the most liberal Democrat could suggest that without being laughed out of the room.
I cant beleive Im saying this. But. Good speech George!
