BT bod moots musical mams By Lester Haines Published Thursday 13th October 2005 10:46 GMT Get breaking Reg news straight to your desktop - click here to find out how Here's an appealing thought: an mp3 breast implant which will allow surgically-enhanced girls to store and play back their entire music collections from their 36DD assets.
We kid you not. According to UK tabloid the Sun - ever watchful for life-enhancing technology, especially when it's got a big jubs angle - BT Laboratories bod Ian Pearson reckons breast implants may as well do something useful if they're to be permanently installed, rather than just looking decorative.
Accordingly, he's proposed sticking an mp3 player in one dug, and a storage chip in the other. Quite how playback is achieved we're not quite sure*, but it may well involve the listener burying his or her head in the cleavage for a full stereo effect.
Likewise, God alone knows how you select tracks, but breasts do come equipped with a pleasing alternative to the iPod's selector wheel. We can imagine the scenario: Girlfriend: "Oi, what the bloody hell are you doing?" Boyfriend: "Hold on, I'm just scrolling down to Stairway to Heaven." ®
Bootnote *Oh, OK then - Ian Pearson said "flexible plastic electronics would sit inside the breast. A signal would be relayed to headphones, while the device would be controlled by Bluetooth using a panel on the wrist". We prefer our solutions, naturally.
- Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
Quite how playback is achieved we're not quite sure*, but it may well involve the listener burying his or her head in the cleavage for a full stereo effect.
I'd say that carries a motion towards being "interesting" enough
(note: yes I saw the asterik you fuckin nazis - I'm ignoring it. It's not nearly as much to visualize.)
Tikker wrote:You can tell I'm a geek cause my initial reaction was not "hohohoho, boobies for earphones" but rather "how the fuck will you change the batteries"
I dunno.. the idea defintely has merit. Sex would be interesting to say the least - I mean, one wrong nibble, and suddenly we'd be rockin in time to Winger or some other shit he has programmed in there.
kaharthemad wrote:I wanna see where the headphones jack into.
Tikker wrote:You can tell I'm a geek cause my initial reaction was not "hohohoho, boobies for earphones" but rather "how the fuck will you change the batteries"
Given that you're enhancing the cup size, you could use a kinetic charger. To recharge batteries:
1) Remove brassiere
2) Employ trampoline
Tikker wrote:You can tell I'm a geek cause my initial reaction was not "hohohoho, boobies for earphones" but rather "how the fuck will you change the batteries"
Given that you're enhancing the cup size, you could use a kinetic charger. To recharge batteries: 1) Remove brassiere 2) Employ trampoline
Really, who wouldn't be in favor of this?
hrm
I'd sell my services as a boobie jiggler to help the poor unfortunate hot chicks get their mp3 players charged up again
