Can you legally beat a woman in your state?

[DESX]

Found a pretty funny site with actual laws that where passed a long time ago. They have some for every state. I checked some of them out and these actually do exist. http://www.crazylaws.com/

My Fav

Arizona- A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.

[Minrott]

I'm moving.

[Minrott]

Racine: It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep. Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.

That's not entirely unsensible seeing as some people refer to Racine as RapeScene. That shithole makes Detroit look like Malibu.

[DESX]

Iowa- You may shoot Native Americans if there are more than five of them on your property at any one time.

[liquidstayce]

In the entire state of Maryland, it is illegal to give or recieve oral sex.

WTF......

[labbats]

Iowa- You may shoot Native Americans if there are more than five of them on your property at any one time.

/safety off

[Martrae]

According to Ohio law, it's against the law to kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church without a license.

[Dylan]

Iowa- You may shoot Native Americans if there are more than five of them on your property at any one time.

Does it count if they're invited?

[DESX]

...... comon

Utah-It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.

Texas-It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.

[Gaazy]

West Virginia

• It is against the law for men to have sex with any animal over 40 pounds in weight.
• It is unlawful for chickens to lay eggs before 8AM and after 4PM.
• In West Virginia it is illegal to dig for ginseng on your neighbor's lawn without their permission.
• In West Virginia, it is legal for one to take roadkill home for dinner


i win

[Arlos]

Hollywood: It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

I would LOVE to hear about someone driving 1500 sheep down Hollywood Boulevard.

This one is for Ralf:

In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated.

-Arlos

[leah]

rule of thumb~

[leah]

ALSO, in nebraska:

• It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license. (THANK GOD)

• The owner of every hotel in Hastings is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts. (that's awesome, i live in hastings... and also, no one provides those nightshirts )

• It is Illegal to go whale fishing. (honestly... WHERE THE HELL are whales in nebraska??? )

[Gaazy]

ummm there are whales in lincoln, didnt u kno?

[labbats]

• It is Illegal to go whale fishing. (honestly... WHERE THE HELL are whales in nebraska??? )[/quote]

Ever been to a Nebraska home football game?

[Gypsiyee]

Virginia Beach, VA

It is also unlawful to drive by the same place within 30 minutes on Atlantic Avenue.

They enforce this pretty heavily too >< It's because "the strip" is the cool place to hang out, and all the teeny boppers cruise the strip.. ie, just drive back and forth for hours

Waynesboro, VA

It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.

Well that'll take care of those woman drivers~~

PS, I got my first ticket of my life yesterday.. from a cop who was driving 10 miles per hour under the speed limit, then said I was following too close (quote him, "2 car lengths away") when all I was trying to do was get a good opportunity to pass his slow driving ass

[Kramer]

These are only the first that I read, TEXAS, is a scary place:

In Houston you cannot buy beer after midnight on Sunday, but you can buy it on Monday.

In Kingsville, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.

In Lefors, Texas it is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer at any time while standing.

In Mesquite, Texas it is illegal for kids to have unusual haircuts.

In Texas criminals are required to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.

In Texas it's legal for a chicken to have sex with you, but it's illegal to reciprocate.

[Kramer]

OK, a few more:

The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.

There is an old law in Texas that states you are unable to tuck your pants into one boot unless you own ten or more cattle.

When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.

You can be legally married by publicly introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times.

[Blackdiam]

Vermont
• As in most dairy states, Vermont does what it can to discourage the use of margarine. For example, it's illegal to use colored margarine in restaurants unless the menu indicates you do--in letters two inches high. Colored margarine can only be served in triangle shaped patties.
• At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole.
• Barre All residents shall bathe every Saturday night.
• Call a Vermont court a "kangaroo court" or some similar moniker, and you might be looking at a $200 fine. It is illegal to defame a court.
• In Vermont It's against the law (not to mention impossible) to whistle under water.
• In Vermont it is illegal to paint landscapes in times of war.
• In Vermont, women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
• It is illegal to deny the existence of God
• It's against the law in Vermont for vagrants to procure food by force. Apparently if you have a good job and stable home life, it's O.K. to procure food by force.
• Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week- - on Saturday night.
• Whistling underwater is illegal
• Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.

[Martrae]

Repetition is the product of a small mind.

[DESX]

• It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

Man wish they had something like this here. ><

[Adivina]

Massachusetts
• A Boston mayor who disliked dancing and liked to retire early once banned midnight dancing in the Hub City.
• A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
• Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
• Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
• All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.
• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
• Boston: It is illegal to play the fiddle. Two people may not kiss in front of a church. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city. No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except o Sundays. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common. No one may take a bath without a prescription. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
• Both Massachusetts and New Hampshire had old laws that penalized gamblers who lost money. You'd get fined in Massachusetts if you had any money left.
• Bullets may not be used as currency.
• Burlington: You may not walk around with a "drink".
• Cambridge: It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
• Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes. • Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
• Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
• Hingham: You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
• Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
• Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
• Holyoke, Massachusetts, makes it unlawful to water your lawn when it is raining.
• In a law that predates returnable bottles and cans, it's illegal in Boston to rummage through rubbish containers.
• In 1659 the state of Massachusetts outlawed Christmas.
• In Boston it's illegal to post an advertisement on a public urinal. It's also against the law to hang a vending machine on a utility pole.
• In Boston, it's illegal to cut firewood in the street, or shoot a bow and arrow in the street.
• In Boston it's against the law to keep manure in a building unless the building is being used as a stable. If it is, you can keep up to two cords of manure. If you're overstocked, you need a permit to move the stuff. And you can't leave it in the street.
• In Boston, Massachusetts it is illegal to take a bath unless instructed to do so by a physician.
• In Massachusetts, it is unlawful to deliver diapers on Sunday, regardless of emergencies.
• In Massachusetts you must have a license to wear a goatee.
• In Massachusetts, if you get caught eating peanuts in church , you can be jailed for up to one year.
• In Provincetown, Mass., it's illegal to sell suntan oil until after noon on Sunday.
• In Salem, Massachesetts sleeping in the nude in a rented room is forbidden, even for married couples.
• It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
• It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath. ---- Wtf a law before just said its illegal to bathe without a doctors note!!!!---
• It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder.
• It is illegal to reproach Jesus Christ or the holy ghost.
• It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
• It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
• It's illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building.
• It's illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road.
• It's illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
• It's illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color.
• It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
• Longmeadow: It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
• Marlboro: It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun. Silly string is illegal in the city limits. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
• Massachusetts law declares that peanuts may not be eaten in court.
• Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
• Milford: Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
• Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• Newton: All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.
• No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
• North Andover: An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
• Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
• Public boxing matches are outlawed.
• Quakers and witches are banned.
• Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
• Southbridge, Massachusetts, makes it illegal to read books or newspapers after 8 p.m. in the streets.
• Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
• Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
• There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs tied during the month of April.
• Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
• Under an old law in Marblehead, Mass., it was illegal to cross the street on Sunday, unless absolutely necessary.
• Woburn: In bars, it is illegal to "walk around" with a beer in your hand.
• You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
• You may not curse inside the city limits.
• You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour.

Well now, I am in big trouble about the sex and body peircing thing >< Fortunatly I have not crapped on my neighbor lately.

[Captain Insano]

Hollywood: It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

I would LOVE to hear about someone driving 1500 sheep down Hollywood Boulevard.

This one is for Ralf:

In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated.

-Arlos

omgod win! Someone find me a law allowing me to smack bitches at bars in San Diego.

I could imagine this now... /tell girlfriend hey you're acting fucking stupid as usual today... /consent me for 3 incher belt plz.

[Velocity]

Washington

• A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
• All lollipops are banned.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
• Auburn: Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.
• Everett: It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
• In Seattle, Washington, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• In Spokane, Wash., it used to be illegal to interrupt a religious meeting by having a horse race.
• In Washington state it's illegal to sleep in an outhouse without the owner's permission.
• In Washington, anyone under the age of 18 must have parental permission to throw a tear gas canister.
• It is illegal to deflower a virgin even on their wedding day.
• It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse.
• Lynden: Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
• Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
Washington state doesn't allow fake wrestling.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.


long list.. so many gems

[kaharthemad]

D.C.
• A D.C. federal judge has ruled that begging is a form of free speech protected by the Constitution. That means that mugging is free speech too, only more persuasive.

I love this one. They should put it in all MMORPG's as well. You beg I get to shoot you.

Georgia

• A Kennesaw, Ga. law makes it illegal for every homeowner not to own a gun, unless you are a convicted felon, conscientious objector or disabled.

This one is true..amazingly enough the crimes commited due to B&E are damn near non exsistant. I would have to check with my friend thats a cop down there but the last time it happened old Aunt Mae(then 78 year old lady) shot the would be burgler with both barrels of a 10Gauge. Police said the burgler was about 5 feet away from her.
The Burgler had been suspected or violent break ins in nearby cities and communities.

Iowa
• Indianola: The "Ice Cream Man" and his truck are banned.

Thank God that fucker around my house is bloody annoying.

Ohio
• Cars are not allowed to scare horses in Centerville, Ohio.

This is a law just about everywhere in Ohio. Seems the Amish around here dont like it.