Need advice about a girl

Sidle up to the bar (Lightly Moderated)

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What do I do?

Go for it. Dump your girlfriend and go after this girl
3
12%
Avoid her entirely and pretend you never met her
5
19%
Tell your girlfriend the truth and give her the option to move on or not. Move on the girl based on your girlfriend's decision
4
15%
Juggle em both secretly while trying to figure out which one you like better and make your choice
7
27%
Let the girl know how you feel and base your decision on whether to dump your girlfriend or not on her answer
7
27%
 
Total votes : 26

Postby Diekan » Thu May 11, 2006 8:08 pm

Yeah I understand your situation. I've always said and felt that men and women can never really be "just friends." One usually wants more than a friendship out of the other - never fails. This is one of the reasons I avoid dating women with a lot of guy friends like the plague.

Ultimately you're just going to have to do what you think is best. If it were me I would evaulate what I had with the current GF. If I really felt that she was the best for me then I would cut ties with the other chick.

What ever you decide to do just remember you have someone else who's investing in you and deserves better than to be cheated on. Not saying you did or are going to, just saying be careful who you hurt - you never know when it'll come back to haunt you.
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Postby Jay » Thu May 11, 2006 8:10 pm

Diekan wrote:Yeah I understand your situation. I've always said and felt that men and women can never really be "just friends." One usually wants more than a friendship out of the other - never fails. This is one of the reasons I avoid dating women with a lot of guy friends like the plague.

Ultimately you're just going to have to do what you think is best. If it were me I would evaulate what I had with the current GF. If I really felt that she was the best for me then I would cut ties with the other chick.

What ever you decide to do just remember you have someone else who's investing in you and deserves better than to be cheated on. Not saying you did or are going to, just saying be careful who you hurt - you never know when it'll come back to haunt you.


What the hell? Who hacked Diekan's acct?
Jay

 

Postby Captain Insano » Fri May 12, 2006 12:21 am

Be a pirate... nail em both and say ARRRRRGGHHH when you unleash the dog of war!
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Postby Gargamellow » Fri May 12, 2006 12:26 am

do you really want a girl who is capable of being unfaithful?
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Postby Jay » Fri May 12, 2006 11:09 am

I never said I was gonna sidebust. I was gonna make her break up with her boyfriend.
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Postby Zanchief » Fri May 12, 2006 11:13 am

On Internet, you can be anything you want.
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Postby Sithos » Fri May 12, 2006 11:13 am

If you have to make her break up with her bf then there is already a problem before any relationship starts.
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Postby Jay » Fri May 12, 2006 11:15 am

Either way I'm just avoiding the whole thing entirely. I have a feeling I'm gonna kick myself in the ass for it but hey.
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Postby Griever » Fri May 12, 2006 11:24 am

Dont dump your current girlfriend. Youll try to hook up with this chick and she'll turn you down or something and youll be left with nothing. For all you know you might be misinterpreting this girl. For fucks sake, its a woman... you need a fucking rosetta stone to figure them out.

Just continue to be friends with the chick and if something develops that you can make a solid decision on, go for it.
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Postby Xaiveir » Fri May 12, 2006 1:05 pm

I have the perfect idea sir.......


You stay with your current girlfriend. You introduce me (you know /assist) the girl at work. I take her out, make her walk funny for a week and all will be solved.

You see, that way, you stay with a girl, and not be unfaithful. New girl at work is now hanging out with me, so she wont come and find you. She will also think you are great for introducing her to a real man. You dont have to avoid her, and make work weird.

Everything you could want and more out of a solution. Just trying to help bro! :wink:
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Postby Agrajag » Fri May 12, 2006 1:15 pm

*Disclaimer* I just read the first couple of posts and skipped to a reply. So, please excuse me if this has been said already.

If she would be willing to dump her current boyfriend for you (presumably, your a better person to her than her current boyfriend) then what is to say she wouldn't dump you for someone else in the future? It goes along the same line as cheating. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

What you have now is good. You have a girlfriend that cares for you and you are really into her, yes? So what if you're "missing an opportunity" with this new chick? You already have something with the ccurrent one.

I voted ignore the new one at all costs. Tell her that you like her company and that the relationship the two of you have can only go as far as friends.

Now, if the situation changes and you both find yourselves single, shag the bitch rotten!
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri May 12, 2006 2:09 pm

What about just being friends with her. Nothing more, and expecting nothing more. Invite her and her boyfriend out on a couple of double dates. You never know what could happen. Your girlfriend and her boyfriend could hit it off. Don't rush into anything.
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Postby Sorina S » Fri May 12, 2006 2:11 pm

Jay wrote:It's hard to explain but like, she's a total fantasy woman ya know. Every bit my type and everything I like about women rolled into one.

To be honest, I've grown disinterested in my gf over the past few weeks to no fault of her own but because of my hectic work schedule and the fact we never spend time with each other or talk to each other. It wouldn't be right for me to endulge on a convenient fantasy when there's someone who stuck it through with me during the times that were a little less than fantasy. So I'm gonna let her know how I feel and let her decide whether she wants to stay or not and I'm gonna try to avoid the hotty hotness of hotosity as much as I can.


The absolute worst thing you can do in a relationship is to tell the other party that youre interested in someone else. Avoid this with extreme predjudice.

If youre unhappy in your current relationship, cut your losses. Its unfair to keep her hanging on while you play the field. You never know, she may have a pocket stud herself.

Overall though, looking back on my sordid expierience. I think Id rather have dealt with the devil I knew. Good luck...SS~
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Postby Juls » Wed May 17, 2006 12:45 am

Diekan wrote:I've always said and felt that men and women can never really be "just friends." One usually wants more than a friendship out of the other - never fails. This is one of the reasons I avoid dating women with a lot of guy friends like the plague.


Dont totally agree with you on that part. I have loads of male friends that are just friends. I may not be as geourgous than the other girls but im still a girl.

As for Jay, Does your GF know you have been having lunch with this girl?

maybe This girl is being close to you because she feels the both of you can click. If she wanted to have a "fling" with you most probably she wouldnt even let you know she has a man in her life.

she could either be treating you as a friend or is at the same dillema you are having now. Confused! comparing her men with you. etc...

Personal advise... Never cheat on ur gf with her and vice versa.. either u break it with your gf and try it out with this girl (after talking to her that is) or stay friends if possible. If you can't handle it. tell her u cant meet her that often until things cool down. UNless u can cheat on your GF and still look her in the eyes and feel comfortable of yourself. Guilt can haunt you for a longggggggggg time
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Postby Dylan » Wed May 17, 2006 12:47 am

Juls wrote:
Diekan wrote:I've always said and felt that men and women can never really be "just friends." One usually wants more than a friendship out of the other - never fails. This is one of the reasons I avoid dating women with a lot of guy friends like the plague.


Dont totally agree with you on that part. I have loads of male friends that are just friends. I may not be as geourgous than the other girls but im still a girl.


Wrong. They all want to bang you.
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Postby Juls » Wed May 17, 2006 1:09 am

lol Dylan.. nope they all are friends.. they even share thier sex life / love life with me.. Guys can be JUST FRIeNDS with girls .... :p Not all want to bang each other :p :lol:
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Postby Diekan » Wed May 17, 2006 1:12 am

And you wouldn't hook up with any of them if they offered right? riiiiggggtttthhhhhh
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Postby Markarado » Wed May 17, 2006 1:12 am

It's very rare that men and women can just be friends. Almost always one side of the relationsip is going to want to be more than just friends when spending a lot of time together. In some cases it is possible though.... Juls and I are just friends, we spend a lot of time together, and neither of us have intentions towards each other. Unless Juls has a secret thing for me :lol:
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Postby Jay » Wed May 17, 2006 1:22 am

Well Juls, I heard that you are making some bank on Knight Online...

And no, my gf didn't know I was having lunch with this girl but I have lunch with girls all the time and it's just that. Lunch. Nothing ever happens and if it were to happen, I'd break it off with her and put some time in between it before it did.

Not that it matters either way we broke up.
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Postby Juls » Wed May 17, 2006 1:53 am

You and your GF broke up? or you and the girl????????

yea i am still making money from Knight Online. It pays more than my work :p
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Postby The Kizzy » Wed May 17, 2006 10:33 am

Juls wrote:Dont totally agree with you on that part. I have loads of male friends that are just friends. I may not be as geourgous than the other girls but im still a girl.



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Postby Martrae » Wed May 17, 2006 11:00 am

Markarado wrote:It's very rare that men and women can just be friends. Almost always one side of the relationsip is going to want to be more than just friends when spending a lot of time together. In some cases it is possible though.... Juls and I are just friends, we spend a lot of time together, and neither of us have intentions towards each other. Unless Juls has a secret thing for me :lol:


That's because you both have already looked at each other and decided sex isn't for the two of you. Sex has already entered the relationship, though, even if it's only a silent yes or no thought.
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Postby dammuzis » Wed May 17, 2006 11:46 am

just friends doesnt work when there is mutual sexual attraction
now if your not sexually attracted to her fine be friends

but if you polish your pole thinking about your friend at work and you have a girlfriend, best way to deal with it is to back off and keep it at work. start having lunch with more people in the same group so that way its not just the two of you etc.

eventually infatuation wears off and you will find that she is not the end all be all you think of her to be currently
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Postby Martrae » Wed May 17, 2006 12:17 pm

Sex is still in the picture because you've decided whether you are attracted or not.
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Postby Jay » Wed May 17, 2006 12:37 pm

Juls wrote:You and your GF broke up? or you and the girl????????

yea i am still making money from Knight Online. It pays more than my work :p


Yeah me and my gf broke up. We're still close friends and it was mutual. It's kinda pointless to be in a committed relationship and not have time for each other especially since the relationship itself was at a wavering standstill. She still stops by on occasion to bring me food though :hiphop:
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