Should I do side work for my old boss..?

[Tikker]

you made it sound like he's using his trust fund money to fund his poker games

in that context, it didn't sound like a real smart idea

[Lyion]

He has money, poker is done purely as a game and sport. If he's profitable and makes money so what? Not like it's a career choice. What would you prefer he do, mow lawns and skirt around the law and risk getting kicked out of the country for evading immigration laws?

While I'm ambivalent in regards to poker, it's fairly easy to get work in most area's of Florida, if he has any marketable skills, which he appears to.

Any sort of temp work is paid by the hour and generally requires no paperwork and is easy to bypass.

If he has cash and doesn't need it, it's all water under the bridge. Most guys shake their head in disgust at the concept of you having water for lunch, while your nonworking, poker playing dude is lazing it up at home. This isn't about you two, but the whole concept which irks most guys, and it'd probably irk you if you were looking at it from an external viewpoint.
Does the guy pay rent/utlities/etc?

Anyways, seems a good work situation for you, Gyp. I'd do it as long as you aren't killing yourself.

[Gypsiyee]

Oy vey how many times do I have to repeat myself guys ><

Work visas are more often than not regarded for doctors, lawyers, high profile jobs. They're not this easy hand out, you have to be spectacular to obtain one; not to mention that an employer has to need you enough to sponsor you, and what employer is going to 'need' a 22 year old who has no specific career trade? We just got his biometrics appointment for next week, we filed his immigration petition in July along with his EAD (employment authorization) - soon as we get notification on that he'll be working again.

Can I just repeat one more time to evade these silly questions that we are perfectly financially secure and he doesn't need to work regardless of if he can or not? I make enough money - I just got an 11k payraise for pete's sake and we were perfectly comfortable before that. **This poll is not because I need an extra job!**

[Narrock]

Grats on your pay raise Gyps! That's very cool.

[Martrae]

I'd work the part-time job while it lasted and sock away the money.

[Gypsiyee]

Yes Lyion, he does pay rent, and bills, and buys food.. he's spent more money just coming here and paying for his immigration than I've spent the whole time we've been together. And he's not lazing it up either, I haven't had to do housework since he's been here.. quite nice really, like having my own housewife temporarily. I rarely eat lunch anyway, I posted that as more of a joke than anything. How do you think we had pierogi's to eat while I'm in paycheck transition? He's handling the money right now. He's super good to me, never met a guy like him - I know it's hard to picture from the outside because it's all based on little snippets here and there, but I really did luck out.

The not working thing is something we planned for as I said.. there's nothing, however undetectable, that would tempt us to risk his immigration right now - we've invested too much of ourselves, time, and money to risk him getting kicked out, especially since him working simply isn't necessary. As vehement as people are about illegals, it's actually kind of surprising to hear suggestions that he work illegally really ><

[Tikker]

well, he's not mexican

[Lyion]

Gyp, I'm not trying to question your situation, relationship, or anything. You seem <generally> like you have a good head on your shoulders. I'm sure if you weren't happy or if things were bad it'd bleed over here, which it isn't.

If you read my previous posts, I merely suggested the reason why guys get a tad defensive is the appearance of the situation, ie, a dude staying at home and playing poker while you are working two jobs with water for lunch.

Perception isn't always truth, and my point wasn't to question your situation, but to explain the guy feelings in this thread based on said perception. I figured since he seems a fairly proud guy he'd be paying rent and helping out, which somewhat alleviates the taxxstility here.

[Gypsiyee]

Nono I'm sorry if it seemed like I was jumping down your throat or anything Lyion, just trying to explain the situation is all. He is a very proud guy and can't stand that he can't work - he's rather bored most of the time to the point where he looks forward to going to walmart and grocery shopping - but in our situation currently (as everyone's is different, as I'm sure you know) the risk vs. reward for him working just isn't a good ratio. Plus like I said, I get to go home to laundry done and put away, house vacuumed, litter box cleaned, bathroom tidy, etc - currently a sweet deal for the both of us =p

In all fairness, I get paid way too much for what I do.. I have a gravy job, had a gravy job before this one. If he could, he'd reverse the roles in a heartbeat and if it were me going to NZ he would do the same - the difference being I never had a trust fund that i could rely on, so I'd be totally screwed and we wouldn't have been able to be together at all.

lol Tikk, well >< illegal is illegal, regardless of where you're immigrating from - the USCIS wouldn't say oh well he's a white guy so he's okay to violate our rules o.O

[Gypsiyee]

oh and for the 10th time lyion! the second job would be by choice and temporary to help Scott out, not out of necessity!

[Maeya]

Do you have any real reason not to? All I see in it are positives - it helps out a friend and keeps your relationship good. It gives you some extra spending money or saving money - neither of which is a bad thing. It doesn't soak up a lot of your time, it doesn't sound like it will be cutting into nights & weekends. It's work you already know how to do, and how to do well.

I'm not really seeing a downside?

[Gypsiyee]

The only downside, I'm guessing, is that I don't want him becoming dependent on me again. I organized every administrative process in that office - the entire system is based on my structure, meaning obviously I'll be most proficient at it because it was designed for what worked best for me. He's rather particular about his employees like I said.. I just fear that it might become one of those things that eventually gets taken for granted and becomes a 'just another week.. just another month' etc. Obviously that's something that I could deal with by requesting more money when the time comes, I just have a tendency to care more about the people I'm working with than to be able to assert myself in certain situations. Strange really, I'm usually a tremendously assertive person

[Evermore]

get a contract then and write in an out clause

[Tossica]

Tell your bum boyfriend to get a job.


j/k

[Tacks]

I'd work the part-time job while it lasted and sock away the money.

YOU would? I laughed.

[Martrae]

Yes, I would if I was in the same situation as she is. I worked consistently from high school until my daughter was born and worked part-time on and off afterwards. I also held several part-time jobs while in high school.

Laugh away, dumbass.

[Harrison]

Your life must really suck for you to constantly be a dick to everyone.

[Tacks]

Your life must really suck for you to constantly be a dick to everyone.

Yeah d00d ur ryte eye wish eye had ur lyfe

[Harrison]

It's ok, you'll grow up one day and your budding breasts can go with that vagina you've grown.

[Tacks]

oh ok

[Harrison]

It's either that or you'll just be Diekan in 10-15 years. This is the more likely route I see you following.

[Evermore]

We need a tampon smiley

[Tacks]

It's either that or you'll just be Diekan in 10-15 years. This is the more likely route I see you following.

oh ok thanks for the advice man

[araby]

I wanna stay busy and make money so I got a second job. If I had a boyfriend though I would stay home and hang out with him instead, hehe.

[Zanchief]

It's either that or you'll just be Diekan in 10-15 years. This is the more likely route I see you following.

Diek's got standards.