For admins everywhere.
How many forum users does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post in OT that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
13 to ask why the thread starter needed a lightbulb
1 maniac who claims he actually knew the guy who invented the lightbulb
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...
another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
5 to make sarcastic comments to bait certain others
3 to take the bait
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
7 to tell everyone how fed up they are with the tyranny of the forum admins and that they'll now leave the forum for good
24 to tell them how sorry they are to see them go but that they understand
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
12 who claim that those supposedly faulty lightbulbs work perfectly for them and accuse those posting above them of being either retailers or the makers of the other lightbulbs trying to sell more of them
4 who start a discussion about the heat resistance of lampshades
11 who think that this is faaaar too OT now and to please start a new thread for this
3 who completely ignore this request
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
7 to quote the "Me too" posts and add "Me three"
4 old forum members to say "didn't we go through this already two years ago?", then proceed to quote people nobody knows anymore and accuse the thread starter of being a copycat and just trying to become as famous as those former members
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
3 to write just the same thing as the person above them and then edit it with "Ooooops, you beat me!"
2 to burst into huge tirades because they misunderstood the posts as an attack on them
8 whose posts only consist of obscene smileys
3 to call the mods and admins Nazis
11 to log in under troll IDs and make fun of the posts of their favorite enemies
6 friends of those attacked to flame the trolls for "lacking the guts to show who they really are" and proceed to discuss who they think the trolls are
8 to make 50 posts in an hour. All of them have the same opinion but they constantly miss eachothers' points
4 who lack the language skills and have completely misinterpreted the first post
7 who only noticed the thread for its many posts and managed to read the last two posts before posting 1000-word-replies themselves
9 to explain to the former 7 that their points have either already been made or debunked
1 to post an oversized pic of a lightbulb forcing everyone to sidescroll in order to read the posts
16 to ask how to post pictures
4 members of staff to tell those 16 to RTFM!
44 to ask what "RTFM" means
2 newbies to ask to delete their account as this is a stupid forum
8 to try to convince the newbies to stay
2 who feel as if they are in Kindergarten as nobody here seems to know what's really going on
4 mods to threaten they'll close the thread
7 to announce that they'll leave this topic as its really too childish now
3 to gleefully reply that those 7 members only noticed the childishness when they ran out of arguments
And finally 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.