Quotes of the Day

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The Kizzy
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Quotes of the Day

Post by The Kizzy »

Sometimes I hear some funny shit, thought I would post them for you all to laugh.


My brother to me "Janet, come taste these cookies, and make sure I didn't poison myself."

My son to my brother "Hahahaha You are stupid"

My boyfriend to me as I am waving at Orlando Bloom in Kingdom of Heaven "What a fucking rude ass, he didn't even wave back"

My brother talking about THe Leper King "Dude, he must be a ventriloquist, his lips never move"

The boyfriend responds "And a heartless bastard too, he wears the same emotionless expression"


Maybe its all the beers that made these funny, but I can't stop giggling
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Post by Tikker »

I think maybe you should open a can of STFU and just maybe, you know
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Post by The Kizzy »

I can't read your posts when that cleavage is staring me in the face
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Post by Martrae »

Ceiling Cat makes me paranoid.
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Post by Darcler »

Me too. I tried to masturbate but got distracted by continually looking at the ceiling for a peeping cat.
I finally gave up.
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Post by Martrae »

Me too!
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Post by The Kizzy »

Shit, I just pull a blanket over myself. Everyone knws ceiling cat and the spirits of my dead ancestors can't see through tthe comforter. So masterbation is ok.
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Post by Darcler »

It's too hot in my bedroom for a blanket.
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Post by Martrae »

They still know what you are doing!
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Post by The Kizzy »

They make THINK they know, but they have no proof
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Post by Darcler »

Yes, cats and dead people are very smart.
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Post by The Kizzy »

Cats are smarter than dogs. I won't go into details about what happened exsctly, but we have learned to make sure the dogs are out of the room before anyhting commences.
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Post by Gargamellow »

lol ceiling cat
/worship ceiling cat
Jay

Post by Jay »

Oh look, a shitty thread got hijacked and ruined by it's creator.
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Post by Zanchief »

Jay wrote:Oh look, a shitty thread got hijacked and ruined by it's creator.


I wasn't holding my breath for this one turning into a gem.
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Re: Quotes of the Day

Post by Phlegm »

The Kizzy wrote:Sometimes I hear some funny shit, thought I would post them for you all to laugh.


My brother to me "Janet, come taste these cookies, and make sure I didn't poison myself."

My son to my brother "Hahahaha You are stupid"

My boyfriend to me as I am waving at Orlando Bloom in Kingdom of Heaven "What a fucking rude ass, he didn't even wave back"

My brother talking about THe Leper King "Dude, he must be a ventriloquist, his lips never move"

The boyfriend responds "And a heartless bastard too, he wears the same emotionless expression"


Maybe its all the beers that made these funny, but I can't stop giggling


Your whole family are a bunch of retards and it's infecting your boyfriend. Or is it the other way around?
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Re: Quotes of the Day

Post by Jimmy Durante »

Phlegm wrote:Your whole family are a bunch of retards and it's infecting your boyfriend. Or is it the other way around?

:lol:
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Post by Vincenti »

Cieeling cat bothered me until I spoged in his eye, now I just laugh
The object of life is not to arrive safely at the grave in a well preserved body, but rather to come screaching in to the grave sidelong in a beatup wreck of a body, loudly proclaiming "WOW What a ride!"
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Post by The Kizzy »

I will be the first to admit things are funnier when I have been drinking
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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