ChICk and Clubs
Moderator: Dictators in Training
Because in order to really dish out honest, accurate and quality advice - you have to really KNOW someone. Now, perhaps if you've got those like brinstar and araby (who've actually met in real life and know each other) then sure... but me asking you, or you asking me for serious advice doesn't exactly work.
I don't know jack about you, really, and neither do you about me. Despite the superficial drivel we all post here on a daily basis - none of us really know each other. With a few exceptions in regards to those who've actually met.
It's not that we're not "real people" at the other end, nor is it because an issue of intellect - it's just hard to offer or take real advice to someone who you don't really know or who doesn't really know you.
I don't know jack about you, really, and neither do you about me. Despite the superficial drivel we all post here on a daily basis - none of us really know each other. With a few exceptions in regards to those who've actually met.
It's not that we're not "real people" at the other end, nor is it because an issue of intellect - it's just hard to offer or take real advice to someone who you don't really know or who doesn't really know you.
Last edited by Diekan on Sat Dec 16, 2006 7:33 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Uh, Diek's right. You do need to know about the whole thing from both sides in order to tell someone what you think. You could tell us your side, we throw in our 2 cents, and you do something stupid because we only knew your side. (Hello, prenup situation).
Relationship advise is not to be asked over the interwebz.
Underwear, cars and birthcontrol, on the other hand, are fine to ask about.
Relationship advise is not to be asked over the interwebz.
Underwear, cars and birthcontrol, on the other hand, are fine to ask about.
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Yes, but not about relationships. Seriously, take Gargs prenup thread for example. The way she was telling us, Whatshisname was being a dick about it. When Whatshisname came on here to defend garg (snicker) we foudn out that it was because of family pressures. That changes any advice we would have given.
See what I mean?
If it is advice that you need involving two people and your lives, it really should be asked to complete stranger, especially when the other person isnt here to give their side of a story.
See what I mean?
If it is advice that you need involving two people and your lives, it really should be asked to complete stranger, especially when the other person isnt here to give their side of a story.
Mark brings up an interesting point, lots of times when people openly ask for advice, we become very selective listeners or just plain old don't take any of the advice that is offered. It's like we can't find a good way to deal with an issue, so we ask other people until we find the one that has the magical easy answer to our problems.
Thus, asking for advice is partially a "hope" type of thing, hope that there is an easier or better way out of or through difficulties. It can become very frustrating and annoying to people who are actually asked for the advice, because it feels like wasted effort when they don't do or even consider doing what you suggested, even when it turns out that whatever that was could have saved them a lot of trouble.
I know I've annoyed the hell out of a couple people by not taking advice they offer when I ask for it. I guess no matter what anyone says, sometimes you just need to experience things for yourself and make your own mistakes.
A quote from High Strung says it best, "People just believe what they want to believe."
Thus, asking for advice is partially a "hope" type of thing, hope that there is an easier or better way out of or through difficulties. It can become very frustrating and annoying to people who are actually asked for the advice, because it feels like wasted effort when they don't do or even consider doing what you suggested, even when it turns out that whatever that was could have saved them a lot of trouble.
I know I've annoyed the hell out of a couple people by not taking advice they offer when I ask for it. I guess no matter what anyone says, sometimes you just need to experience things for yourself and make your own mistakes.
A quote from High Strung says it best, "People just believe what they want to believe."
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