The Bat Killer (a mini blog)

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The Bat Killer (a mini blog)

Postby The Kizzy » Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:31 am

So today is our receptionist's last day. Everybody brought in food, and we were having the lunch at noon. Our office has a big office for the owners in the front, with glass walls. Everyone but the receptionist was in the office doing some marketing stuff, me included. The office manager from our other office comes in at Noon, and she was talking briefly with the receptionist. All of the sudden, they both scream and come running into the owners office and slam the door shut. They were screaming BAT BAT. So we get them settled down enough to tell us that there was a bat hanging from the moldings in the front office. I went and got one of those hard wood floor shammies. Everyone is yelling WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WE WILL CALL PEST CONTROL. As I am getting that, our listing lead guy goes out the back door and opens the front door. I hit the bat dead on, and it falls to the floor, squealing. It squirms its way behind some computers that were just delivered. I try to push it out the door with the shammie, but it makes a lunge, and I dropped it as I back up. The handle is hanging out the front door. Dennis grabs the handle, and starts sweeping the bat outside. All the time all of the realtors are still in the office screaming. I go outside and pick up a brick and slam it down on the bat. It squashed blood everywhere. I have been dubbed Bat Killer in my office. Then we all ate pasta, brownies, and Cassada cake. It has been a good day so far.
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Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Susvain » Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:45 am

omfg you savage
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Postby Martrae » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:10 pm

Why would you kill a bat? They eat mosquitos and other nasty flying biting bugs.
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Postby Harrison » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:10 pm

Killing a terrified bat because it got stuck somewhere...wow
How do you like this spoiler, motherfucker? -Lyion
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Postby Zanchief » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:11 pm

Harrison wrote:Killing a terrified bat because it got stuck somewhere...wow


Fucking hippy.
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Postby Harrison » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:12 pm

:rofl:
How do you like this spoiler, motherfucker? -Lyion
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Postby Dylan » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:12 pm

All hail Silvestra! The Bat Slayer! :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :locked: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:

Seriously though, I want you on my next trip through bat country.
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:14 pm

Because bats carry diseases. We don't have mosiqutoes in our office. :darkangel:
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Arlos » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:17 pm

Why not chase it outside and let it fly off?

-Arlos
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Postby mofish » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:18 pm

Arlos wrote:Why not chase it outside and let it fly off?

-Arlos


No shit. What kind of ignorant shit was that, beating it to death for no reason?
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Postby Martrae » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:20 pm

How very Medieval of you. How hard would it have been to just get it out the door and left it alone?

Bats can carry rabies but that doesn't mean every one you see does. Unless it was acting erratically, it's highly unlikely it was infected.

Educate yourself. http://www.fws.gov/endangered/bats/bats.htm
Inside each person lives two wolves. One is loyal, kind, respectful, humble and open to the mystery of life. The other is greedy, jealous, hateful, afraid and blind to the wonders of life. They are in battle for your spirit. The one who wins is the one you feed.
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:21 pm

I am a trained bat killer. I know my business.

Oh and DUH, if I would have let it outside in the sun, it wouldhave burst into flames anyway. :angel:
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Zanchief » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:26 pm

Kizzy wrote:Oh and DUH, if I would have let it outside in the sun, it wouldhave burst into flames anyway. :angel:


That's a good point.
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Postby Tuggan » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:26 pm

haha, you people are pussies. its a fuckin bat, its not like she crushed a kitty with a rock. settle down.
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Postby Zanchief » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:30 pm

Tuggan wrote:haha, you people are pussies. its a fuckin bat, its not like she crushed a kitty with a rock. settle down.


A cat is a better animal than a bat?
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Postby Tuggan » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:32 pm

well duh. cats are cute and cuddly, thus not appropriate to be crushing with rocks. bats on the other hand are flying rodents with scary teeth and sonar, so crush away.
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Postby Harrison » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:39 pm

Bats are awesome, they fucking decimate the mosquito population
How do you like this spoiler, motherfucker? -Lyion
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Postby Tacks » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:40 pm

I crushed a cat in the skull with a brick this morning and then I tied a rope around it's neck and drug it behind my car as I drove to work.
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:42 pm

I believe that. You never did like cats.
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Jimmy Durante » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:42 pm

You should have bit the head off and yelled the lyrics to Crazy Train.
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Postby Minrott » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:14 pm

Killing cats is a pastime. Killing bats is a felony. Here anyway.
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Postby Captain Insano » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:21 pm

Kizzy wrote:I am a trained bat killer. I know my business.

Oh and DUH, if I would have let it outside in the sun, it wouldhave burst into flames anyway. :angel:



you are my hero. You need a costume or something in case of further bat infestations or possibly tarrantula assault
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Postby Minrott » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:22 pm

wtf about zombies?
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Postby The Kizzy » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:32 pm

I don't do zombies like in my younger years. I'm much to pudgy and old to be kicking my leg up that high. I remind myself of Bubba Hotep
Zanchief wrote:
Harrison wrote:I'm not dead


Fucker never listens to me. That's it, I'm an atheist.
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Postby Zanchief » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:41 pm

Kizzy wrote:I remind myself of Bubba Hotep


You have a growth on your penis?
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